MARRIAGE INSTITUTION by Bola Olu-Jordan
WHAT MARRIAGE IS: Just like many of our universities and other institutions of learning, Marriage is a formal institute of higher learning. It has its own admission policies, learning procedures, courses of study, faculties, lecture time, examinations, lecturers, hostels, rules, regulations, and other students. You have to apply for a formal admission to be a student with a formal course of study to pursue in the institution. Unfortunately, you never graduate for life! The course we study in the institute of marriage differs. We cannot all study the same course, just like in the secular. Some people study Accounting, Medicine, Engineering, etc, same with the marriage institution. You must have a course of study. Many enter into marriage institution without a course of study. Your course of study depends largely on your partner For instance, if your partner is the violent, lousy type, you might probably be studying a course like Human Relations with masters in conflict resolution. If your partner is the irresponsible type, perhaps, a management course will be appropriate. Every institution requires a project to complete your course. It is the same in the institution of marriage. Your partner is your project; A partial fulfillment of your course. If you know how relevant project is to a course of study, then you will know how important your partner is and how important it is for you to pass. Your partner is not your problem, he is your project: A core course you have to pass. Don’t quit your project. Determine to pass no matter how difficult. Determine to make more research. Depending on your course of study, some of the courses you need to take in your departments and PASS may include the following: Usually, the courses are what you see and hate in your partner. They give you headaches, but you have to pass them. Take them up one by one and begin to read-to-pass. You must pass them; otherwise you will have to rerun or carry them over. The courses are: i. Anger, late night outings, irresponsibility, not showing love, other loves, rating his family more than you, uncaring, lack of help at home with house chores like laundry, kitchen, babies, children homework, lack of hugging, kissing, romance, not taking you out for dinner, not following you to the salon, not interested in your work or project, lack of money, not there in times of trouble, preferring his friend to you, elevating his siblings and extended family more than you, hatred, unspiritual, not sexually active, NFA, not proactive, doesn’t care for children, doesn’t care for your parents, family, siblings, life, future, work, etc… Your partner is your project, not your problem. Project means research; which means you have to ‘research’ into your partner. Gather information in the library and from others. One beautiful thing about research is that the more you do it, the more discoveries, facts and findings you have. But you have to pass the project ANYHOW. MARRIAGE QUOTES ... Marriage is a commitment that requires constant planning and maintenance. .. Marriage is a commitment that will only last if you're willing to put everything else subservient to it. Marriage is not a cure-all. Things that you found amusing during your engagement will drive you absolutely homicidal after a few years of marriage. Marriage is a commitment, learn how to compromise with your spouse or else. Marriage doesn't dissolve differences, it amplifies them Marriage is not a magic wand that will whisk away your psychological baggage Marriage is about dying to self, where to become one and create a new entity ... children being the most conspicuous byproduct of this union A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know. ~Mistinguett (Jeanne Bourgeois), Theatre Arts, December 1955 |